Miss to Mrs!

Final Bride Blogger – the last time I’ll write as a Bride!

I’ve not written as many Bride blogs as I would have liked really. Wedmin has taken over …. but technically I have been writing. I’ve been writing my poem/speech for the big day. I’ve been writing the table plan. I’ve been writing messages to drag in those pesky RSVPs (the whole process of guests: writing your guest list to sending invites to getting in RSVPs to sorting where they’ll all sit  – is the hardest part by far! A wedding would be so simple without guests! 😉 ) I’ve also been writing jobs lists for the Wedding party and instructions for the venue.

It turns out a wedding isn’t just about marriage. Well it can be if you literally go the registry office to get that all-so-important piece of paper that boasts your status of husband and wife…. but as I’ve said on previous blogs, for me, it has always been about everyone we love in one room being there to celebrate the event. Our Best man said that the most important thing is that we are there are to say our vows. Even though I appreciate this sentiment (and of course it is true, if you pick one thing from the whole day that is the important bit!) we have chosen to spend thousands of pounds celebrating it how we wish, so the other stuff becomes important too.

The wedding is now in 2 days time (eeeeeeeek!) And it is an event. We are going to the venue the day before. We have boxes and boxes of stuff: favours, decorations, gifts, photo booth props etc etc. We have entertainment arriving.  We are throwing a social event – putting on a show if you will! I’ve been so finicky about typos on the ceremony reading…. particular about the decorations all being the same….funny about the photo collages being just right… and I then have to hand all this over to the venue and hope it all comes together.

I’m doing a speech, which I’m not nervous about at all. I figure if I can stand in front of a room of 15/16 year olds on a daily basis, then this crowd should be easy in comparison! People are there because they love us (or at least like us!) and I know I don’t have to win them over… so that’s all good. I am nervous about the walking down the aisle because I’m clumsy! Yes if I tripped over mid aisle, it would be funny…but I don’t really want the ceremony being remembered for that! I’m also nervous about the vows… at the minute I can’t listen to my entrance song without crying – how am I going to make it through saying all those vows aloud? Does it legally count if they can’t be heard through sobs and sniffles? Haha!

I’ll admit I’ve been a stress-head at times the last few weeks. But things have happened to cause this: guests not knowing the date, people being able to come/not come (oh and then come again!), different managers at the venue, family fall-outs, and I was also upset because a close family relative can now not make it because he has been called back to his submarine work (can’t be helped; just one of those things – but still sad)… things have cropped up, but we’ve dealt with them. (Hope it is all smooth from now on and I’ve not just jinxed it!) No matter what some friends and family say, I WILL be chilled on the day…. well maybe not calm and quiet, as that’s not my nature! I’ll be silly, excited and giddy. I won’t be stressed and worried. By that point, if things do go wrong, I won’t bother. I’m not daft – I do realise this day only comes once. I want to enjoy it! I do want the day to be “perfect” (whatever that means) and I know we have done (along with great friends and family) everything in our power to get us there… things may go wrong on the day, but it won’t matter. As I always say too, when things go wrong, it means I get a story out of it! 😉

Today is about visiting more family and having my nails done…maybe some honeymoon prep? Last few shades of Gray to paint 🙂 See you all when I’m a Mrs!

XSXS

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Giving Notice of my Single Life

Bride Blogger Part 9

Today, we went to “give notice”. A phrase that a lot of people seem unfamiliar with, especially if they got married in a church. It’s basically the legal bit (the same as having your bands read I think) and to give people a chance to object in this notice period.

The whole idea kind of makes me laugh. The hoops you have to jump through to make sure we’re for real….I mean we’ve been together for ten years and lived together for 6! Surely the stage in our relationship we want to get to or show to society is up to us! We have to prove we are a real couple, yet people can get pregnant and become parents without so much a “you sure you’re ready to be a parent?” That’s where the real interviewing and questioning should come in my opinion. Just a thought!

Anyway, as we walked into the small, clinical registrar’s office, I felt like it was a mixture of a job interview blended with a quiz show. It was serious…but there were easy questions that I may not get right under pressure! And you can argue the prize was Kenny 😉 The job interview link is also like you are “giving notice” from a previous job. My job as a single lady is done: this is my notice.

The questions were easy… about Kenny’s full name. That one isn’t as easy for me as it is for others mind. Kenny changed his surname by deed poll when he was younger – but PING I knew the previous and new names! Ten points to me. I also knew his job title (he started a new job in Jan and I finally managed to memorise this title last night!) wahoo, ten points! I knew my Dad’s full name (two middle names – so surely I should have got extra points?!) and I kind of guessed at his job title… maybe lost ten points on that one? Then I got all ready to answer about my Mum – but didn’t need to! I was thinking “Come on, I know this  – ask me, ask me!”

We were asked if we’d lived together in our house for more than a month. I was like “yeah for almost 6 years actually!” Bonus points?! After that, I did want to get creative with my answers and have a bit of a laugh:

“Is there any chance you two could be related?”

“Well, we live in Swad, so we could be!”

But, no. I fought against this urge. It was serious and legal stuff…not a time for joke about webbed feet, incestuous Swad folk. Even though, it would have lightened the mood! She also asked me three times if I’d been married before! I knew I should have hidden that wedding ring 😉 (I’ve only ever been married to my books…and they’re starting to get fed-up of me!)

At the end of my interview, she lost the online form. It disappeared. I was thinking, “Great! If we have to do it again, I best make sure all of my answers are the same!” But, luckily she salvaged it. It then failed to print! I wanted to say, “Ah, Kenny is really good with computers, I’ll go get him! See, see, that’s something else I know about my husband-to-be!” 20 points?

Kenny’s interview went without a hitch: no repetitions, no issues. Says it all really! It now means we can get hitched!

I won the quiz…. and I got the job as a future Mrs Holmes…unless anyone contests it…shouldn’t joke really, as that’s something that would probably happen to me! Haha.

XSXS

It’ll be alright on the Wedding Day…

Bride Blogger Part 8

I’ve been absent from the Blogging world for a while. Wedmin, wedmin, wedmin! For those of you who aren’t all-consumed with wedding lingo, “Wedmin” is a very cleverly coined compound word for wedding admin, but you could probably figure that out 😉 I do wonder what I did with my time B.E (as in Before Engagement) – what did I do with those precious moments that are now spent making table confetti? Or cutting out inserts for the invitations? Or finding photographs to decorate the venue? Writing poems for nupitals? And when I get a break, I read wedding magazines in the bath!

Overall, it’s been an exciting time and I do enjoy all of the planning. We’ve had a few stressful things happen though that I’d thought I’d share with you fellow-brides or anyone else who wants a giggle:

Way back before Christmas, my Mum and I went to the florist to book flowers plus a glittery curtain back-drop for our venue. A glittery curtain? If you’d said to me years ago that we’d be forking out a small fortune to hire a glittery curtain for our wedding, I’d have laughed so hard, I would’ve spat wine in your face. But we have a massive window behind the top table in the venue room and it boasts a not so romantic looking view of the car-park. So, we need something to cover it. This one we wanted had been used at our venue loads and we thought “bugger it,” it saves anyone spending hours making something that may not look half as good. This is what weddings do to you – you spend on things you never thought you would want or need, but it is all about choosing what to spend your money on. Anyway, I digress. We went  to book this and with crossed fingers asked if the coveted curtain was available on our wedding day. She looked and said;

“Oh it’s already booked that day. At the Riverside hotel with a royal blue colour scheme!”

“What? But OUR wedding is on that date at that venue with that colour scheme!”

Wedding planning does make you a tad crazy. So after this had sunk in, I started to ponder if I had actually already booked it without remembering! But this booking had someone else’s name and they’d already picked flowers and paid their £50 deposit. I’m crazy, but not that crazy and think that even in my mad Wedmin mode, I would still remember giving a false name, choosing flowers and parting with 50 quid! So by this point, I couldn’t give a flying flip about the curtain, but was worried about our venue being double-booked! But a quick phone-call by our helpful florist solved the puzzle. It turns out this other couple had got engaged, gone straight into planning mode and ordered flowers and the curtain, paid the deposit before even booking a venue. They then hadn’t got as far as that because they broke up in the meanwhile. So the venue is ours; the curtain is ours (well for the day) and they are out £50 and don’t even have each other 😦 Sad –  but a lesson can be learnt. Don’t go booking and paying for things straight away before you even have a venue! You could break up…. or just give other future brides like myself, a heart attack!

Speaking of the venue, we still love it and are still very excited. It has caused us some stress also, however. Since booking our special day, they are now on their 3rd manager! Is it me and my incessant bridal questioning that has scared them off? Surprisingly, no! The first manager went on long-term sick – and I know this can’t be helped, but I was very disappointed because I felt like in addition to investing in the venue, we had invested in him also. I clung onto the hope he would be back in the New Year. He did get better but then left the hotel. We had dealt with a relief  manager in the meanwhile and then next time we had visited, there was another one. I know this shouldn’t matter. Our wedding will be great (the mantra I repeat with every single, piece of confetti I make!) but I just feel we have to keep going back to step one, telling the new manager everything!

Another annoying thing to bring us to the current wedding planning week, is the invitation making. I had this idealised idea that we would have a lovely evening printing off our invites to our nuptials. After the first click, the printer decided to chew up our envelopes. One by one. Turns out, in addition to our 80 guests, the printer wanted feeding too! So fingers crossed, we get those sorted this weekend! Things will go wrong, but as I say, I always get a story out of it!

As they say, it’ll be alright on the Wedding night day!

Keep posted for some Hen Do stories!

XSXS

Bride Blogger Part 7: The One

Wahoo, I have found the one! Yes – I have found my – the – wedding dress! After discussing my wedding dress hunts in Bride Blogger part 6 (https://samanthagray9.wordpress.com/2014/08/16/hunt-for-the-perfect-wedding-dress-and-bridal-shop/), I did indeed return to the one good shop I had found. I had 3 appointments in total at Alison Evans Bridal Wear and it certainly was ‘3rd time lucky,’ as they say!

Funnily enough, the dress I chose was one of they very first dresses I tried on (possibly even the very first) and I didn’t like it! I preferred others, didn’t like the sleeves etc. But now I love it. I think I had to rule out all the others and realise that the sleeves can be altered/pinned down and can look great. So, yes the search is over.

Getting the dress home and it becoming officially mine, wasn’t the easiest of things though. I have joked to Kenny that finding ‘the one’ as in a husband was much easier than the wedding dress! He took slight offence until I explained there was no question of him being the one – but there were lots of questions involved with the dress 😉 Think I dug my way out of that one!

The dress I decided on was £875 originally and reduced to £600 when I tried it on. I knew, however, there was a sale on the week after and the lovely sales assistant informed us that the dress should go into the sale. I suggested we would be best to buy it now anyway – to ensure we got it – and still for a good price! She urged us to wait for the sale, claiming we could save another couple of hundred. Why would she say that? I hear you cry…….. well, as I said in the previous post, it seems good business and means they maintain excellent word-of-mouth. We were also told, there had been no particular interest in ‘my’ dress and most appointments were booked now leading up to the sale. So, we (yes I dragged the Mums and bridesmaids along again) decided to wait .

All week there was a nagging feeling. What if someone went in, loved it and bought it at £600? What if other people had tried it on and would be fighting for it in the sale? But there was nothing I could do. I didn’t even have control over queuing in the sale and fighting for my dress of honour! The sale began 10am on the Fri – well I was at school. So, it was all left up to my Mum and Dad to queue up, take the paperwork with dress info, hunt it down and pay. Simple?

We joked about them camping outside the shop in their camper van. I still think they should have – even if just for the comedy value. And it would have given Dad a great story for his wedding speech! We also heard about 7 women all coming in for the same,one dress. I never heard what happened with that – I never heard of a wedding dress shop scandal or fight in the newspaper, so assume it was OK! Anyway, Mum and Dad got there early enough and started queuing – whilst I was in a lesson at school going out of my mind! Mum text me at half 9 saying ( I’d just like to point out, I didn’t check my phone until I was out of lesson!):

‘There are about 8 people in front of us – but some are together. There is only one girl who looks the same size as you, but she looks a bit chavvy and won’t be after your dress! Alison just came out with chocolate biscuits!’

Lol, I love my Mum – cracks me up. She also questioned why the shop owner would give them chocolate biscuits when they were about to touch white dresses? Good point I guess! My Dad joked that they wanted to fatten people up so they would need alterations! 😉  haha. Within another ten minutes, I received another text:

‘Got it – just waiting to pay. £435!’

So that was it – wahoo! It is now hanging proudly in my old bedroom and my parents’. My dad even put up a hook for it 🙂

The one (husband-to-be and dress ticked off!)

XSXS

From the Little Black book to a Bigger White book….

Those of you whom read regularly will know that my blogs are random. They are to reflect life: random. I write about things that pop up, occur and just happen. Or perhaps topics close to my heart that I have thought about that day. From now on – up to the next couple of years – there is no escaping that the blog posts may get a little more wedding related 😉 So, I’d like to offer myself as a Bride Blogger – for those in mine (and other) wedding parties to share ideas/read of my planning/ laugh at me etc! For those not involved at all, should still get a laugh and a giggle out of my Bridezilla stress. Because you don’t realise how every little damn thing becomes magnified when it comes to wedding prep! I didn’t. (And I’m still only in the first couple of months!)

Yes, I am now a fiancee. I no longer have a little black book (not that I did anyway – you could fit my previous conquests on a napkin! 😉 ) I now have a nice, bright, white A5 wedding planner – because who needs an actual wedding planner in the form or a human, when you have a notebook?! God, I love making lists and that ‘skill’ will finally come to good use! Nothing ever may get ticked off the lists….but still 😉

You don’t realise  – or I didn’t  – how much there is to think about. I always thought, ‘Oh, I’d do it on the cheap and it wouldn’t take long to sort!’ I still think this in theory – and we don’t want a big, fancy affair but we do want lots of people. The joining of family, friends and everyone you care about is the most important thing to me . Unfortunately, this mass of people need feeding and everything! 😉 So, even though we’d love to get married as soon as possible, we seem to need the next two years to save money and sort everything out. So, the planning to me is the first exciting stage. (My fiance may not agree with this!)

After being engaged, the whole world turns into one huge wedding. I notice other people’s engagement rings now, and every place I drive past is a possible venue. I strain my neck to see if there is a suitable, cute garden or if they do accommodation – surprised I haven’t crashed yet! 😉 Every colour I see becomes a possible bridesmaid/colour theme. Every white dress is possible bridal couture for myself. Every sentimental quote I see, is a possible ‘personal’ touch to make the little things important on the big day – screw the guests, I’ll be surrounded by word plaques!  😀 haha.

I’d say that I’m still in the overwhelmed phase. In a good way. Everything seems a possibility and I’m just collecting ideas to fill those blank pages in my book 😉 I havent been engulfed by the invitations, save the dates, wedding menus – where I might just suggest we cook and eat the groom instead. No, it’s all very nice still. It will be interesting to see how this develops I think! I have a lot of friends and acquaintances getting married too in the next 24 months, so I hope they will share ideas and read this too 🙂

Next post: Venues! (We are going to see our first 2 on Friday.)  – I actually had my first ‘Bridezilla’ moment when I was booking these. One hadn’t replied to my email in over a week. I became very ‘well if they want us to get married there, then they should be efficient enough to reply!’ This was also because every other venue and immediately invited us along/emailed us/phoned us just for looking at their website! I emailed again saying ‘we would appreciate a response this time ASAP as we were seeing other venues that day.’ Cue, a response immediately with an apology and we are now booked in. I can work this Bride thing! 😉

Wedding Quote 1:

‘Marriage lets you annoy that one

special person for the rest of your life!’

See you soon wedding planners….

XSXS